Tag: anotetoself

Journal- June 5, 2021

Irrespective of all the pragmatic reasoning and intellectual discourse one gives oneself, certain matters slips out of hands, overwhelmed we are thus of the circumstances or people who rupture the serenity of our being and leave us to question our own sanity in the wake.
Oft, I believe finding right words to express the turmoil within deserts us, when required earnestly.
If only rain could come down pouring…

How do we allow someone to have enough hold on us to hurt us, it’s when we open ourselves to them. How imperative it’s then to keep ourself locked into a shell but what a pithy living that is again when you can’t breathe free and express yourself fully in a language meant for love.

My heart misses thousand beats, reminiscing the chink that has made into its shell by one whom I let myself be seen.

Is it love when you get overwhelmed by someone or it’s the impression of someone being a match to your mind that you are thrilled with.

Back to Masters

Every piece of writing by all those profound writers influence me.

For a while I slip into a stupor, drunk in their words, the meaning of life in between their sentences- and it’s a wonderful feeling to live the lives they create and weave in between the printed words one after the another.

The social and cultural milieu a writer belongs to reflects in the fabric of their prose. It’s beautiful, it’s like minuscule architectural beauties embedded in a huge structure.

I’m taking a break from all the web readings for a while and go back to the roots where I begin my life, ghosh, Woolf, Marquez, Conrad, Bronte, Eliot… those are the concrete pillars I hold onto whenever I feel myself losing to the insanity of the world around me.



It’s difficult to understand everything, it’s like reading in shadows, fleeting light from the creeks of windows and doors. Life has become interminably incomprehensible, dried and cracked. There are spaces enough to get in and probe yet so hardened that I perish the thought of what’s beyond those cracks.

I have no patience nor energy left to fight and grapple with people, and the world around me. I’m just letting it be- everything. I want to be left alone in peace and not be bothered about.

May be it’s me who is a difficult person or may be not. Whatever may be the case. I still would prefer to be left at it and not be badgered about that. Sometimes, leaving one in peace is enough to settle down the nerves.